It’s all there.
The haze. The forgetfulness. The failure to finish one simple task before beginning another. The anxiety and the million what-ifs.
What if the room isn’t ready in time? What if he comes early? What if I lose time to write?
I am a writer. I am a mother. I have a second child due the end of July. How does all of this work together?
I can let these worries plague me, and believe me, I have my weak moments.
But in this time of uncertainty, a time where it seems I have more questions than answers, I can also hold on to what I do know – the solid, unfazed truths that will always be in place.
I am a writer. I will never not be a writer.
I am a mother. For as long as I live I will love my children for all they’re worth (and then some).
I am surrounded by loving and compassionate people who care about me and my family. This has been true no matter where we as a family find ourselves due to the moves of the job: Kansas, Nebraska, Indiana, California. Good people exist everywhere.
No matter where I go or what stage of life I find myself in, I will always have opportunity to serve others. Be it through my work as a writer, my calling as a mother, my community involvement or daily interactions with strangers, calls to service will always exist.
What if, in the flurry of moments of new motherhood I fail to write every day?
I have to remind myself that the world isn’t going anywhere. I have to remind myself that there is a season for everything under the sun.
And, I have to remind myself to not take life so darn seriously.
In these hazy days before the delivery of our second child, the questions and uncertainties abound. Seasons come and go in our lives, and the work we define as most important shifts.
Shifting is okay.
The world will always be there. Little ones, in their sweet infancy, won’t.
What anxiety has been plaguing you lately? What truth can you hold onto through the uncertainty?